Why is it you can’t come up with a clever comeback at the very time you need one? But of course, a day later you can always think of something great that you should have said. Instead you say something moronic like “Oh Yeah” or “Same to you buddy”.
Why can’t you say something cleaver like Winston Churchill did when a woman accused him of being drunk and he replied by saying “Madam, I will be sober in the morning and you will be ugly the rest of your life.”
A solution in this situation would be for both parties to stop and exchange phone numbers so that each person could have some time to think up something great. You could go home, get on the internet or consult a few friends, reference a few things and then when you are prepared call the person back and say, Hey Bob, this is the person who you cut in front of at the Jiffy Lube last Monday. Remember? Then you told me what you thought of my ancestry after you flashed me the single digit hand puppet.
With my flawed memory I probably would say, “Sir, you are sober, and I will be at Jiffy Lube the rest of my life.” Then I would hang up.
This inability of mine to remember something important or useful is an irritating problem. Mind Glop is the reason if you want my opinion. I mean,
I can remember the words of the theme song for the show “Car 54 Where Are You” or “The Adams Family” theme song, “They’re creepy and they’re kooky, mysterious and spooky they’re all together ooky” but I can’t remember my bank account number or blood type or come up with a good comeback when I really could use one. Your mind retains all those jingles to commercial products, some that don’t even exist anymore, like Dr. Pepper’s;
“I’m a pepper. He’s pepper. She’s a pepper. Wouldn’t you like to be a pepper too?” or the Almond Joy jingle; “Sometimes you feel like a nut, sometimes you don’t.”
The list just goes on and on. It can get really clogged up, up there in the old attic with this Mind Glop. “Plop, plop, fizz, fizz, oh, what a relief it is!” “Two all beef patties, special sauce, lettuce, cheese, pickles, onions on a sesame seed bun.” “Where’s the beef.”
Stop, Stop, you say.
All of this mind glop doesn’t make me feel like “I’m a pepper,” when I go into the garage and can’t remember why I went in there. I just stand there staring off into space with the look on my face like a constipated Basset Hound. It makes me feel “like a nut” and “kinda ooky.” Give me some of that plop, plop fizz stuff, my mind is full of useless glop!
Mind maintenance does not get the attention it deserves because of life’s endless distractions and daily stress factors. However, spending time on mental health is vital and the most efficient way to feel centered and less anxious about what may be happening in one’s life.
I need to clear my mind. Maybe eat more fish, take some medications like Prevagen, or Estrogen. Problem is I always forget those items when I’m doing my shopping!